Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Speakez-Vous English??!!

I sometimes wonder how in the world people who obviously have no idea how to speak, read or write English are allowed to draft contracts...in English! I mean, do they actually think the sentences they have constructed make sense? Do they really think that their points have come across to the reader? Do they know what points they want to make? Do they know how to write????
This is what I've been contemplating as I've been correcting, re-correcting and swearing at contracts that go something along the lines of this

" If Trustees shall desire in pursuance of this Article to pay money for benefit of person who is minor or it incapacitated the may pay they same to any other person (legally authorised to receive they same on behalf of minor or incapacitated) for that purpose without being bound to see to it that I have absolutely no idea what the hell I'm talking about and am systematically speaking out of my ass while copying and pasting these clauses from contracts that were written in English by Spanish speaking monkeys on the island of Crete in 1909 and which I personally think are very good and will certainly provide adequte protection for my company.... where's my promotion?"

ahhhhhhhhhrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Welcome to the working world of Abu Dhabi!! I have been reading similar documents (written in English??) for the past 25 years. Sometimes if I am in a good mood or the workload is less I get a good laugh.

Anonymous said...

Welcome to the working world of Abu Dhabi!! I have been reading similar documents (written in English??) for the past 25 years. Sometimes if I am in a good mood or the workload is less I get a good laugh.