Off To The Big City

I got in!!

Off to Dublin to be a WigHead.

Just Waiting...Still Waiting...Yep, Stiiillll Waiting!

I've been waiting for the postman since 9am this morning.
It's now 1pm and he still hasn't shown.
Don't get me wrong, I love the whole 'postman coming to your door in his little green van' postal system!
But my results are out today, and I wonder if he knows that and isn't just taking his time on purpose!
Evil postman!

PatternsOf Reality

Poincare asked "Why is the reality the most acceptable to science one that no small child can be expected to understand?"
Pirsig asks "Should reality be something only a handful of the world's most advanced physicists understand? One would expect at least a majority of people to understand it. Should reality be expressible only in symbols that require university-level mathematics to manipulate? Should it be something that changes from year to year as new scientific theories are formulated?"
He goes on to explain that in a "value-centered Metaphysics of Quality this "scientific reality" platypus vanishes. Reality, which is value, is understood by every infant....science is a set of static intellectual patterns describing this reality, but the patterns are not the reality they describe."

The patterns are not the reality that they descibe.
Not the reality that they describe.
A description of reality.
Not reality itself.
Not real.

Reality, as I've been saying all along, is subjective.

On another note, I'll be back to the rain soon.

100,000 years to extinction??

I read somewhere the other day that a species usually has about 100,000 years before it destroys itself.

Does anyone know how long humans have been on earth?
I just want to know how much time I have left.

Clarity In The Stars

The Barefoot Doctor writes that 'there's something disturbingly privileged about living through and witnessing first-hand such momentous phases of human history as the one we're in now. This will be the stuff of history lessons a hundred years from now, if there are still schools, or even people, for that matter'. Bar the latter extremely depressing question, it a startlingly accurate statement. He's right. We are witnesses to a new era, to events of massive proportions. He explains that the 'key to sanity at this and every time is to remain centered in the present'; to 'become aware of the breath and consciously decelerate the tempo, feel the life force in your belly.'
It's much easier said than done really isn't it? I know my own mind is forever in the throes of analyzing the past, or trying to predict the future. I hardly ever focus on the moment. I did last night though. I floated on my back staring at the stars, the only person in an empty swimming pool; and I concentrated on the moment. On the present. I gained calm, I gained clarity, I gained perspective, and I came home and fixed something that I didn't want to break. Sometimes you have to think about yourself, follow your instincts, and try not to let the ego and self get in the way. Try not to be so stubborn ;)

Lock Me Away

I feel like locking myself into a room forever,
I don't think I can handle civilisation anymore.

I tear myself apart to defend anothers honour,
and then they tell me they kinda liked the way it was before.

Now I'm left here standing with a body unwhole,
no thread could hold together this self-ravaged soul.

I'll walk through the night with my heart in my hands,
blood dripping behind me as I blindly advance.

Fighting The Inevitable

Is there anything admirable in fighting against the inevitable??

That's something I'm wondering. The way I see it tonight...there isn't. Fighting against the inevitable is pointless. And yet, we all do it. Whole societies are doing it. I fight against the inevitable on a daily basis. And for what? What do I gain? Recongnition? Praise? Contentment? No on all counts. I can tell you what I lose though. I lose my time, I lose my sleep, I lose my energy, I lose my mind. The only things I can think of that I gain are wrinkles. And personally, I don't want them.

Life seems to be a constant lie. Lying to ourselves, to others; and the one that hurts the most, lying to those you love, to those who love and trust you. It's crazy. And yet, society imposes upon us this necessity to lie. Why? Because of the continual fight against the inevitable. Everyday I'm seeing this fight more and more in the Arab world.

It's really getting me down.
I just don't want to lie anymore.

Life is over in a blink of an eye. There's no time for doubts, for procrastinating, for shyness. Take all the chances you're given. Tell every single person you love that you love them; put your arms out that give them a hug. Time waits for no one. If its there, if you feel it, let it show. Don't waste your time in a job you hate, or with people you don't even really like. Take life by the shoulders and shake it till every single last bit of it is used up. Do it all, and don't let it be that in your last breath you wished you had done more.

David Hume's 'Senseless Child'

David Hume was an empiricist. That is, he believed that all knowledge is derived exclusively from the senses. The scientific method of experimentation is a good example of carefully controlled empiricism. So what? you may ask. Well, don't you see where this line of thinking takes you? Let us look at a child that was born without any senses whatsoever, a 'senseless' child so to speak. A child unable to receive any information from his senses. What would be the mental state of the child? The mental stae of the adult that he becomes? Would he have any thoughts? Hume believed that he would have no thoughts whatsoever. Senseless = Thoughtless. If you think about it, it's very interesting. We assume that as a human, we instinctively have thoughts. But what do we have thoughts about?? Things we see, things we hear, things we touch, smell, taste. What if we had none of our senses? What then would be think about? Our entire lifetime of experience is built up of data we glean from the use of our senses - 'sensory data'. And this is the basic line of thought of Hume and other empiricists. Pirsig noted 2 problems with this reasoning. Firstly, considering the question: what is this substance which gives off this sensory data?? If all knowledge is obtained from sensory impressions, and if there is no sensory impression of substance itself, then it logically follows that there is no knowledge of substance. That is, it is all in our minds. I can imagine that many of you who read my blog would be appalled at the very thought that the world we live in, our lives, are anything other than solid, and concrete, outside of and out of the control of our subjective selves. And yet... well I digress. Secondly, Pirsig considered the issue of causation. If all knowledge comes through our senses, then we must ask the question: from what sense data is our knowlege of causation received? That is, what is the scientific empirical basis of causation itself? Hume was of the opinion that, simply, we imagine causation when one thing repeatedly follows another, because to consider otherwise would be out of line with empiricism, as there is no evidence for causation in our sensations.
Hume believed that our idea of causation is little more than expectation; expectation for certain events to result after other events that precede them. For this Hume coined the term 'constant conjunction'. That is, when we see that one event always 'causes' another, what we are really seeing is that one event has always been 'constantly conjoined' to the other. The reason we do believe in cause and effect is not because cause and effect are the actual way of nature; we believe because of the psychological habits of human nature (Popkin & Stroll, 1993). Hume believed that 'Nature' and 'Nature's laws' are creations of our own imaginations. To an extent, I would agree with this last statement. I say to an extent, because at some point I begin to wonder what the situation would be if humans were not around. Would there be no cause and effect simply because we would not be here to identify it?? Surely we can assume that animals have basic concepts of cause and effect. I believe Popkin and Stroll should not have limited their reasoning to human nature, and instead have referred to the nature of all living organisms. An experiment I learned about so many years ago comes to mind; that of a sea slug being prodded with a finger and then blasted with a jet of water. Over time, the simple prodding of the finger brought about the recoil that was its instant reaction when squirted with water. The slug had identified the connection between the initial prodding and the final squirt of water. Cause and effect. And yet, we're back to the question of what would happen if the slug had no senses? If it could not feel the prod of the finger or the squirt of water? A senseless slug? Is cause and effect a by-product of our sensory observations?

Immanuel Kant said that it was David Hume who caused him to write his 'Critique Of Pure Reason'. In it and through it, Kant effectively tries to save empiricism from the consequences of its own self-devouring logic. He said "That all our knowledge begins with experience there can be no doubt...But though knowledge begins with experience, it doesn't follow that it arises out of experience." He identified aspects of reality not supplied immediately by the senses. Such as space, and time. We do not sense time; that it, it is not present in our sensory data. And yet, we do not ask ourselves if time exists! We do not ask for sensory data to confirm its existence. Such 'a priori' concepts are neither caused by the sensed object nor bring it into being, but provide a kind of screening function for what sense data we accept. We apply these concepts of space and time to the impressions we receive. Otherwise, the world would be unintelligible. I am not sure who to attribute this quote, but it was said that, in fact, "Reality is a continuous synthesis of elements from a fixed hierarchy of 'a priori' concepts and the ever changing data of the senses."

So is that what reality is?? I don't know. In fact, I really should not be posting about this, as I am in no way an expert on this. I don't think I could even be called a beginner; That is, I know that little about it all. I need to read more; understand the points of view of those before me, before I can make my own conclusions, offer my own opinions, or indeed, speak about their theories. What I know of their thoughts is not worth talking about. It's the tip of the iceberg, and I know that. So, I'm off. I'm going to the bookshop. Enjoy.

It Is Later Than You Think

I was clearing through my room today, and I came across a scrapbook that I had put together in 2000. Of course you forget about so many things until you're reminded of them in some way, whether its a noise, a smell, a memory trigger, or actually coming face to face with it. Don't you ever wonder what the point is of living if you forget 90% of it? I mean, so much that happens is just forgotten. That's why its good to have a sister, she remembers things I forget, and vice versa. Although its usually her remembering things, my memory is shocking lately! Still though, she need only remind me, and it comes flowing back, and I remember that it didn't happen like that at all! What is she saying?! Different aspects of the same situation impact differently on different people. I remember the looks, the body language, she remembers the words. That's the way it is, and it works out just fine. But, I digress, the point was that I came across this scrapbook, and what it is, is a book of newspaper clippings. Things that were in the news that I thought were interesting, that I thought I would like to look back on in years to come. What did I see? The same things that are in the news today. Nuclear weapons, Hezbullah, Israel, ceasefires, gay rights, and halfway through the book, the trial and execution of Timothy McVeigh. If you'll remember, he was the 'Oaklahoma City Bomber' put to death by lethal injection. In the book is his story, day by day for almost 3 weeks. It was something that I now remember had a profound effect on me. It was the beginning of the end perhaps. The beginning of an interest in justice, in the policies of countries, in what I have come to realise will be an eternal quest for the truth. I have no interest in bringing up the past right now, and even less interest in depressing you any further than I am sure my previous posts have, but it has made me think. I know that many argue that capital punishment is effective justice; that it deters future crime. But I ask, should we not use our resources in a manner that seeks to REFORM these criminals. Can we justify the giving up on them that is capital punishment? Is it not just a simple way to end our problems? To ensure that they will not be taking up room in our jails, depleting the countries resources and not putting anything back into the economy? The easiest option is usually not the right one.

Its a debate that goes round in circles. I dont know about you, but I'm sick of spinning. Thats all that I've been doing lately. Today, I made the first step towards slowing down the spin. I can't say what it is, but I'm excited. As Horace once said ' it is later than you think'. I don't want to waste any more time. I want to end this post with a quote by Harold Whitman, I think it says it all:
"Don't ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."

Links To Articles Of Interest

"'Gaza is a jail. Nobody is allowed to leave. We are all starving now'"

"Palestinians tell Blair: you are not welcome here"

For those that think that America is some 'saint' when it comes to fighting wars, and upholding human rights, I have this to say. There is nothing saintly about starting wars; and human rights?? How can human beings decide what rights we as humans are entitled to have?? Such rights should exist to the extent that those who are entitled to take our lives away from us say they should exist. As you can see, this effectively means that, for the Palestinians, Iraqis and Lebanese, it is America, Israel and the UK that decides what their rights as human beings are. God help the Arabs is all I can say. And yet, I fear that even God will have to go through them, the only axis of evil that I can see evidence of (US, Israel and UK), and gain their permission, before being able to help!

Here are a few more snippets of articles that may be of interest. Click the highlighted words to view the full articles:

"In October 1950, the first year of the Korean War, American soldiers massacred tens of thousands of innocent people in the North Korean city of Sinchon. In perhaps the most horrifying incident, US soldiers led 900 residents, including 300 women and children, into an air-raid shelter. After the victims passed three days in thirst and fear, the GIs poured gasoline into the dark, confined space and threw in a match"

"The head of Europe's human rights watchdog yesterday called for monitoring of CIA agents operating in Britain and other European countries, after President George Bush's admission that the US had detained terrorist suspects in secret prisons."

"In one bedroom, a picture of the late Pope John Paul II was found carefully torn into three pieces. "The picture was hanging on the wall, and we found the glass from the frame still intact, but the picture had been torn," said Tawfic. "For me it shows the Israelis don't like either Christians or Muslims, only themselves.""

To Be, Or Not To Be; An Engineer?

Paul Coelho was asked how he had decided he wanted to be a writer. Here's what he said:
"When I was fifteen, I said to my mother: 'I've discovered my vocation. I want to be a writer.' 'My dear,' she replied sadly, 'your father is an engineer. He's a logical, reasonable man with a very clear vision of the world. Do you actually know what it means to be a writer?' In order to answer my mother's question, I decided to do some research. This is what I learned about what being a writer meant in the early 1960s:
A writer always wears glasses and never combs his hair. Half the time he feels angry about everything and the other half depressed. He says very 'deep' things. He always has amazing ideas for the plot of his next novel, and hates the one he has just published. A writer has a duty and an obligation never to be understood by his own generation.. A writer understands about things with alarming names, like semiotics, epistemology, neoconcretism. When trying to seduce a woman, a writer says: 'I'm a writer', and scribbles a poem on a napkin. It always works. When invited to say what he is reading at the moment, a writer always mentions a book no one has ever heard of. Armed with all this information, I went back to my mother and explained exactly what a writer was. She was somewhat surprised. 'It would be easier to be an engineer,' she said. 'Besides, you don't wear glasses.' "

It made me laugh, because its something that myself and Ismaool were talking about the other night. The differences in how life, the world, problems and so on are approached depending on how your mind is trained. He's an engineer, I'm a lawyer, our approaches to life couldn't be any more different! Paul Coelho's mother was right when she wanted him to be an engineer. You know why? Because he's always going to be SURE. An engineer sees life as a set of right or wrong answers, there's nothing in between. There's no deliberation. There are formulas, equations, methods; follow them and you're on the right path. On the way to correctness, to excellence, to TRUTH. Ask me what truth is, and I tell you that it depends on whose side you're looking at it from. Truth in what sense? I ask you whether truth as a fact really does exist. In effect, I complicate my life. I don't think its a characteristic of all lawyers. In fact, my good friend P is a lawyer, and if you listened to our conversation over dinner last night you would realise that being a lawyer is in no way a hinderance to his being sure about anything. His background as a lawyer means that he is open to looking at a problem from many different points of view but it does not encourage him to complicate his life. Maybe it's just the philosophical writer within me. I always was very good at coming up with all those different 'meanings' that writers of classics intended. We all know they intended none of it. When they said the table was round, they meant the table was round. They weren't intending it to be a metaphor for the circle of life or something similar... Or did they?
See what I mean!
To be honest though, I think an education in the arts is far more beneficial in the long run. It may mean more complications, but it means you can think outside the box. Or it should mean that. For many, thats sadly not the case. But thats for another post.

So Now An Actual Language Is Offensive?

Did you hear about the guy who was prevented from boarding his plane in a New York airport until he changed his t-shirt? It's true. What was on his t-shirt that was so offensive? Perhpaps the stench of BO? Or maybe his breakfast? The words 'I Have A Bomb'? No. Simply, Arabic script. That's it. What's more, the translation was right underneath it in English.
Read HERE for the full story.
If you want to check out his blog, click HERE.

Maybe I Just Need Some Sleep

like a bird on the wire, like a drunk in a midnight choir, i have tried in my way, to be free.
like a worm on a hook, like a knight from some old-fashioned book, i have saved all my ribbons for thee.
and if i, if ive been unkind. i hope that you will let it go by.
and if i, if ive been untrue, i hope you know it was never to you.

like a baby stillborn, like a beast with his horn, i have torn everyone who reached for me.
so i swear by this song, i swear by all that ive done wrong, i will make it, i will make it all up to you.
i saw a beggar, leaning on his wooden crutch, he cried to me, you must not ask for so much.
and a pretty woman, leaning in her darkened door, she said to me, hey why not ask for more.

Leonard Cohen "Bird On The Wire"

its really late, and this song is just going round my mind. its from memory, but i think the lyrics are right. im so stuck, i just dont know what to do. i dont know which direction to take. every moment i feel so close to a decision, so close to the path i should take, but then the next minute ive lost that grasp and im drowning in the abyss that is my thoughts. the problem is that ive become so caught up in the 'theory' of it all, that im almost incapable of taking action. afraid to go one way in case i should be going the other. remaining suspended in midair, treading the water of my mind, failing to get out into the battle that is the world.
maaybe thats the problem... or maybe i just need some sleep!

Long Before Consciousness Set In

"Phaedrus remembered a line from Thoreau: "You never gain something but that you lose something." And now he began to see for the frist time the unbelievable magnitude of what man, when he gained power to understand and rule the world in terms of dialectic truths, had lost. He had built empires of scientific capability to manipulate the phenomena of nature into enormous manifestations of his own dreams of power and wealth - but for this he had exchanged an empire of understanding of equal magnitude: an understanding of what it is to be a part of the world, and not an emeny of it."

exerpt from "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance", Robert M. Pirsig

What a morning... Socrates, Aristotle, the Sophists, Plato, Phadreus and Leonard Cohen.

It feels like I'm about to grasp another piece of that jigsaw I've been trying to put together these last months. I still don't know what the finished picture will be.. but I'm sure when that last piece fits in, I'll be looking at something so familiar, I'll realise that it was I who cut the pieces, who painted upon them the images, and who decided what it would be, long before I was conscious of this fact.

Sometimes I Forget...

Ok, I'm going to go out on a limb here and ask....

What do I have to do to get to be a Blog Of Note?

For those of you who aren't bloggers, Blogger.com has a little popularity ladder going on (doesn't everyone!). Every now and then, they put someones little unknown blog on the top of that ladder on their list of Blogs of Note. What happens then? Well, hits skyrocket! Instead of your normal daily hits, which for me would be somewhere between 5 and 50 everyday, you can expect to get a few thousand!

What's the point? What do you gain? More readers, more comments, a larger audience. Does that matter? Well, it depends on the point of your blog. If you've got something to tell people, then a larger audience is what you're aiming to get.

This is the latest Blog of Note "Strangers Among Us".
Here's another, and another.

To be honest, i never wanted the point of my blog to be the number of hits... but it is so easy to get caught up in it. Occasionally, I do find myself comparing my blog to others and wondering what it is about their blog that makes Blogger think it worthy to be a Blog of Note. Perhaps what they percieve as quality of writing is not what I believe it to be. Or maybe what they're looking for is not quality at all, in which case, I'd rather not be considered a Blog Of Note thank you very much!

Or maybe I should just slap myself out of these rare fits of competitiveness. Most times, that's what I do. Apparently today though, it warranted a post. This will be the first, and last time, I promise.

Mother Tongue?

Last night, on the plane over to Abu Dhabi, I had a vision. I was watching “The Wind That Shakes The Barley”, and I realised something that had a profound effect on me. You know how some things just have an impact on you? A “Copernican Revolution” so to speak, where nothing changes, and yet, everything changes!
Copernicus stated that the earth moved around the sun. Nothing changed, and yet, everything changed!
Perhaps it was the combination of the movie and this book that I bought, the very interesting “Mother Tongue” by Bill Bryson…
I was sitting there, the lights of the cabin dimmed, my headphones on my ears, the shouts of the boys giving their lives to free Ireland from the British reverberating through my eardrums, and I realized, here I was, my mother Irish, my father Jordanian (originally Palestinian) and what language do I speak? English! What language? The language of the country that took my parents homelands away from its people. That placed Ireland and Palestine in the situations that they are in. Ireland – divided. Palestine – a hometown for the jews.

Therefore, I am going to learn Gaelic, and I am going to perfect my Arabic. Young men died for the freedom to speak Irish, and now, hardly anyone in Ireland speaks the language. Its a shame. I will persevere and I will speak the language that my Irish blood dictates I should speak. I will persevere and not stop until my Arabic is of the standard that my Arab blood says it should be.

Exams...Oh Crap!

Well folks, I probably won't be posting for the next week. Heading up to Dublin tomorrow to sit those dreaded exams.
For the next week I will be holed up in a hotel room surrounded by papers, papers and more papers; caffeine tablets to keep me awake; ginger nut biscuits (because I read somewhere that ginger boosts brain power); and if I had one, I have no doubt I would be in possession of a lucky horse shoe too. Nevertheless, I am horse-shoe-less, and feeling quite jumpy at the mo.
I don't know if it's nerves, or denial, but I wasn't able to do very much studying today. I mean, really, not very much at all. 5 hours tops. Crap, the day seems so long until its actually upon you. Oh well, I think I'm taking this very well actually.
I'm just going to go in there and answer the questions.
If I put down what they're looking for, then brilliant!
If I don't...

*deep breaths*

...well, let's not consider that option. I shall assume that I will be putting down what they want.
And maybe I'll put a few smiley faces at the bottom of the paper to be on the safe side. You know, project the whole professional, intelligent, law student attitude they're looking for.
Absolutely. Brilliant Idea.

Now, if you'll excuse me... I can't seem to find my pink pen!

A Wolf In Sheep's Clothing

So you've heard the latest?
Israel doesn't want to accept peace-keeping troops that do not recognise the state of Israel.
Israeli UN envoy Dan Gillerman made clear Israel's unhappiness with some of the contributors. "It would be very difficult if not inconceivable for Israel to accept troops from countries who do not recognise Israel, who have no diplomatic relations with Israel," he told the BBC. He said they would be "very happy" to accept troops from Muslim countries they have friendly relations with. "But to expect countries who don't even recognise Israel to guard Israel's safety I think would be a bit naive," he said.

I ask, what about guarding Lebanon's safety?? Oh, of course, how could I forget? Lebanon is an Arab country...who needs to protect the Arabs? It's the Arabs that are destroying infrastructure, and slaughtering innocents. Yes, that's right. So, let's forget about them, and concentrate on protecting Israel. The land of democracy, and equality and a policy of non-violence.
I think I'm going to be sick!

His comments were dismissed by Malaysia, which, along with Indonesia, has a Muslim majority population.

"We're going to be on Lebanese territory ... We're not going to be on Israeli territory," Foreign Minister Syed Hamid Albar said.

Exactly!
Where is the Lebanese Government? Do they not have a say in what troops are stationed on Lebanese soil??

And you know the worst thing? People are going to start saying "Yeeeaahhh...Israel is right! Why DON'T these countries recognise it?" And the worlds attention is going to be distracted from the issue at hand, that is, the protection of a country and its people (I'm talking about Lebanon!), and be shifted to an issue that has nothing whatsoever to do with the situation. An issue, in fact, that has no doubt been raised as a sort of "wolf in sheeps clothing" to allow this violence to continue.
Let's just hope we're not that stupid!

What Loyalty Means

There's this guy I know...let's call him "X".
X grew up in America.
His parents are Arab.
He's currently finished his masters from a top US university, and is working as a paralegal in a well-known law firm. He plans to go to law school and then hopefully begin working for the US Government.
Since I've known him, which is about 7 years, X been trying to perfect his Arabic. He speaks it as much as he can, and is always going on about the Arabic food he eats with his parents and the Arabic things they do together. All in all, he proudly tells everyone who will listen that he is ARAB!
Brilliant isn't it?
Well it would be, if it wasnt so hypocritical.

You see, something that I should tell you about X is that he hasnt been to visit his family in the Middle East in a couple of years. His parents are always begging him to go with them and he refuses. In fact, he told me that he will continue to refuse until he finally gets that job with the US Government. Huh? That was my reaction. It could be 10 years before the job even comes up! Why? For what reason? Is it because he's too busy? Apparently not. Too broke? Again, answer in the negative. The reason he refuses to go to the Middle East, the country and area that he so proudly claims lineage to, is because he DOES NOT WANT A TRIP "HOME" TO JEOPARDISE HIS CHANCES OF WORKING FOR THE US GOVERNMENT!!!!! He said that before the US Government employs anyone, they run a complete check. If they found that he had visited the Middle East in the near past, then they would refuse to give him a job. And he accepts this!

Now, call me crazy, but isn't that a little bit hypocritical? So here he is telling the world that he is Arab, even though his accent and mentality are so very American, and yet, he then shys away from the connection for the sake of a job that he might not even get! Is America now putting conditions upon being Arab?? Can he not see that by abiding by this informal rule he is indirectly affirming their beliefs, and the beliefs that they insist on imposing upon the world, that being connected to the Arab world can only mean trouble. If that was him, I would tell them to take their job and shove it where the sun don't shine. How dare they restrict his access to the Arab world by a faint threat of future limitations upon his job choices! America will argue that as a Government employee one's first priority must lie with America. That the safety of America prevails. That by accepting to work for the Government, one has to accept limitations upon rights that one would otherwise have taken for granted. The 'right to travel' must take a back seat to the safety of the USA. This no doubt will include keeping away from 'terrorists', and countries where they come from. Fine, if that's the way they want it, they have every right. But perhaps X should stop and ask himself where his priorities lie. There are plenty of jobs out there, and I for one would prefer a job that paid a little less, if it meant I kept my dignity.

I am disgusted with his attitude to the situation. Will this attitude help the world as it stands? No, it will not. It is an attitude that merely affirms America's place to dictate what the world can or cannot do. X, you should be ashamed of yourself, and I have every intention of telling you this next time we speak. Don't call yourself an Arab, because one of the best traits of Arabs is their loyalty. And you my dear, I'm not even sure if you know what loyalty means!

noone, not even the rain

ee cummings once said
"We do not believe in ourselves until someone reveals that deep inside us something is valuable, worth listening to, worthy of our trust, sacred to our touch. Once we believe in ourselves we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight or any experience that reveals the human spirit."

Tonight I don't want to think of war. Tonight I don't want to think of pain, and sadness, and hunger and death. I don't want to think of statutes, and cases, and neverending notes. I just want to sit and enjoy the silence. I think tonight of what Oscar Wilde once said, that "Death must be so beautiful. To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one's head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no to-morrow. To forget time, to forgive life, to be at peace." Yes, tonight I want to read something, not because I have to, nor because it will afford me any tangible benefit; But, just for its own sake. For its beauty, and its poetry, and its simplicity and truth. To appreciate it. To sink slowly into its soft sweet rivers of emotion, and feel the shivers run down my spine. The aftertaste of its meaning lingering upon my tongue, the scent of its words clinging to my skin. I'm so sick of objectivity, impartiality and sensibility!

some ee cummings...

somewhere i have never travelled,gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skillfully,mysteriously)her first rose

or if your wish be to close me,i and
my life will shut very beautifully,suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility:whose texture
compels me with the colour of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens; only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody,not even the rain,has such small hands